
Hello,
I’m back. I’ve been blogging a lot more lately after a nearly seven months gap since you last heard from me. There is a reason. Let me get a cup of tea and tell you all about it and what I’ve been up to.
So, I finally finished my Aromatherapy diploma case studies back in April and sent off the whole 18-months-worth of work to be marked. Which it was, and I got my shiny (not really shiny, papery really) certificate, insurance and all that aromatic jazz. But some spooky timing was afoot and, without going in to all the details, I had the opportunity to go for a job at the place I worked that I had always quite fancied. Now I was in a little bit of a pickle because although I USED to quite fancy it, at this point I was fed up with working for someone else and felt ready to be more of a self-employed person. So this chance came along at a weird time.
Nevertheless I went for it anyway and got the job, knowing that unless I tried it I would always wonder ‘what if’.
Well, I tried it. And you know what? I didn’t like it.
Not that I couldn’t do it. Not that I wasn’t good at it. Not that I couldn’t cope with it. Actually some days I couldn’t cope with it.
I just didn’t like it.
Here’s what changed when I took the job:
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Monday’s I’d leave for London, come home on Thursday night most weeks.
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Stopped blogging
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Stopped sewing
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Didn’t do aromatherapy for anyone
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Stopped eating healthy
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Stopped cooking and eating dinner with my husband
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Stopped feeling inspired
It’s not that anyone else stopped me from doing these things. I stopped myself from doing these things. By the choice I made to do the big girl’s job in London.
So I quit.
And you know what? It was the most empowering thing I ever did. I felt really powerful. Because I wasn’t giving something up, I was making a positive choice in my life and taking control. I realised I hadn’t felt in control for a long time.
Here’s what else I learnt about me:
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I am ready to be self employed.
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Doing something ‘important’ only makes you happy if it’s important to you.
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My family and friends really really believe in me more than I believe in myself sometimes, so I should listen to them.
:) :) :) :) :)